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Wickensworth

Sometimes I like to go to the grocery store and stare at the Jiffy Mix boxes. They’ve kept right up with the latest packaging trends, haven’t they? In case you don’t frequent American supermarkets, here is what a box of Jiffy Mix looks like:

Jiffy Mix

This design pleases me. It pleases me a great deal. One time on a school trip I visited the Jiffy Mix factory in Chelsea, Michigan, but I didn’t think to ask what was up with their packaging. Their marketing department is probably just some old Willy Loman-type character, and his only job is to produce advertisements for obscure AM radio stations. These are the sorts of daydreams I experience as I stare at all the amusing Jiffy Mix boxes.

As far as I know, Jiffy Mix hasn’t even adjusted their prices since 1950. It still costs like 38 cents for a box of Jiffy Mix. They have no idea what inflation means. Their attitude is: “Who cares if we’re hemorrhaging money? We don’t even check our financial records. You know what are our income was last year? Fuck you, that’s what it was.” Needless to say, Jiffy Mix is one of my all-time favorite foodstuffs.

Comments (10) to “Jiffy Mix”

  1. I also remember that field trip. It made a big impression on me. Whenever the opportunity comes up I am sure to mention that the blueberries in Jiffy Mix and most other mixes are actually apples. (that’s pretty much the only factoid from the trip I kept with me.) I remember we were all given parting Jiffy gifts that included a white Jiffy Mix cap that felt like some kind of cloth/paper hybrid, a blue googly-eyed creature with a chef hat, and we each got to pick out one box of Jiffy Mix. I picked pizza doe. It was ok.

  2. I’m kind of disappointed about Brandnewary not working out. You’re one funny guy, your blog makes me laugh every time. I was looking forward to a whole month of humor 🙁

  3. YOU ARE A FAILURE IN MY EYES. *turns away to cry* SIXTEEN DAYS, GOOD MAN. THIS IS THE WORST BRANDNEWARY EVER.

  4. Sorry for the stinging commentary, but seriously dude. Get back on the ball D=

  5. Man, you really fucked up Brandnewary.
    I’m telling my dad.

  6. HAIKU

    NO BRANDNEWARY
    STINGING DISAPPOINTMENT
    MY HEART WILL NOT HEAL

  7. I also attended a grade school field trip to the Jiffy factory in Chelsea. I distinctly recall the paper hats, and the free box of Jiffy Mix. I got corn muffin mix – exactly as pictured in your post. Unfortunately, I remember little else, though there is a partial image in my brain of giant, stainless steel mixing equipment – something like that.

    As for the Jiffy company’s questionable decision not to update its packaging for, oh, the last several decades – when you’re AMERICA’S FAVORITE you don’t have to apologize for anything.

  8. Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix – Copy Cat recipe

    Makes: 6 muffins.

    When a recipe calls for a box of Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix, here’s a copycat recipe you can make at home.

    This recipe is equal to one 8.5 ounce box of Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix.

    Makes 8.5 ounces (equal to 1-box of Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix) Makes 1-1/2 cups of mix. Makes 6 corn muffins.

    INGREDIENTS

    2/3 cup all purpose flour
    1/2 cup yellow corn meal
    3 Tbsp granulated sugar
    1 Tbsp baking powder
    1/4 tsp salt
    2 Tbsp vegetable oil
    1 egg
    1/3 cup milk

    INSTRUCTIONS

    1. Combine flour, corn meal, sugar, baking powder and salt. Mix well with whisk. Whisk in vegetable oil and mix until dry mixture is smooth and lumps are gone.

    2. If another recipe is calling for a box of Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix, add the above mixed ingredients to that recipe.

    3. If you wish to make Corn Muffins, continue with instructions below.

    4. Preheat oven to 400F.Combine above mixture with egg and milk. Mix well.

    Fill muffin tins 1/2 full. Bake 15-20 minutes. Makes 6 muffins.

  9. Seems easier just to use the damn Jiffy mix…

  10. The mix uses lard. The above recipe would be great alternative for vegans.

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