Did you know that the Monopoly game piece you prefer is revealing of your personality? According to this chart I made instead of studying for my finals, it is. Do not argue with my findingsóI have spent a very long time making these careful guesses and random, unfounded claims. Because I like Monopoly, and Iíll tell you why: Itís so realistic. In real life, when you own a hotel or a house, people have to legally pay you money when theyíre just walking by. Also, most peopleís main source of income is passing Go. This level of realism is in contrast to the board game Life, where I canít drive half a foot without having three goddamned children. By the time the game is over (at which point I guess your peg dies), I have so many kids that thereís not even holes for all of them in my car, and I have to just precariously set some of them on the roof and hope they donít fall off. I feel bad about that, but what can I do? They donít let you buy another car. They donít let you do anything in Life. Lifeís a bitch.
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