My favorite part about getting my wisdom teeth pulled is that now there aren’t those bothersome teeth in my mouth. My least favorite part is probably … hmm … that’s a tough decision. However, I guess I’d have to say that it’d have to be the insane, mind-numbing pain from hell that’s associated with it. Yeah, that’s definitely it.

Actually, it isn’t that bad. This may be the Vicodin talking, but once you get over the fact that you’re constantly swallowing blood, your cheeks are puffed out like a little chipmunk and you can’t eat anything other than applesauce and soup, having your wisdom teeth pulled isn’t that bad. You really get a lot of time to relax. For example, yesterday I slept a total of about 21 hours. Even my cats, who sleep almost all the time, are looking at me like I’m lazy. They said, “Christ, are you going to sleep all day? You’re freaking pathetic.”

Changing the subject a bit, does anybody remember freestyle walking? This may have been a regional thing, but about four years ago a lot of young people went through a phase where they thought it was really rad to do tricks with their feet. This entailed them jumping off of benches and then twirling around in the air and then giving their friends high-fives afterward. It was kind of like skateboarding, only without the skateboards or the dignity. I wish I was kidding, but people actually thought that they might look cool by jumping up in the air and then spinning around. Could they not afford Rollerblades? Were they unable to ride a bike? If so, why would they do this in public? I mean, Screech from Saved by the Bell could have walked by these kids and have rightly called them a bunch of losers.

Speaking of Screech, did you know that the actor who played him is now living in a small house with his father, the very person who swindled all of his money several years ago? That is so like Screech.